Image courtesy of Bruce Turner
To be really successful with women in a bar or club environment you need to be confident approaching and engaging a large group. This can be intimidating but, as I have written if you can approach a large group you demonstrate a lot of attractive qualities. It will help you attract girls in the group you are approaching; it will also raise your status within the venue because other groups will notice that you are confident and engaging.
A Good Group Opener
Don’t worry TOO much about what to say. You could ask them what they are celebrating; ask them to recommend another bar; even just introduce yourself. Whichever of these options you choose you will need to get off this topic at some point and carry the conversation. For example:
You: Oh my god, my friends are having a really boring conversation about work- I needed to get away. What are you guys talking about?
Girl 1: We’re talking about who the hottest character in Friends is.
Girl 2: Yeah I think Rachel but my friend thinks it is Joey.
Girl 1: Yeah, can you even compare girls and guys?
If you find yourself in this conversation the opener becomes irrelevant. You are faced with a conversation about a topic in which you have had no preparation and may know very little about. This will happen all the time. Whatever your opener at some point you will need to talk about something you couldn’t prepare for. If you cannot be conversationally flexible like this you will soon lose the interest of the group.
What to Say Next
So- if the topic can be anything in the world how on earth do you prepare how to talk to women in bars? In short you can’t prepare for a given conversation; all you can do is prepare to be able to deal with any situation. I read that a professional footballer should touch the ball a thousand times in a week to make sure he is comfortable and his touch is good in his game at the weekend.
To prepare for an array of different topics you should practice conversations all the time – on your own. As you are on the tube or in bed or on your lunch break run through pretend approaches in your head. This is exactly how you should do it:
1. Mentally picture a bar you know well.
2. Picture a group of three or four intimidatingly attractive girls.
3. Imagine opening them and what you would say.
4. Then imagine them responding in quite a closed way- giving you very little to work with.
5. Then try to take what they have said and turn it into an interesting conversation.
In Part 2 I’ll show you another example of how to talk to women in bars.
