10 Non Pick Up Books to Help You Attract Women
At the moment I am reading the first book in Conn Iggulden’s Conqueror Series, Wolf of the Plains. There is a young character called Temujin (who I think goes on to become Genghis Khan) who overcomes some horrendous challenges in his early life. It is interesting to read how the character is thinking in different situations: how he thinks when in danger, when planning or when talking to someone.
Reading books of fiction, biography or autobiography of men who have succeeded in life is a great way to understand and emulate the behaviour of leaders, winners and alpha males. So in this article I have picked ten of my favourite books about alpha males. This isn’t a definitive list- just books I have got inspiration from and that will offer a nice counterpoint to traditional pick up books.
Top 10 Alpha Male Books
The Emperor Series by Conn Iggulden. These four books, depicting the rise and fall of Julius Caesar, are a really fun read. The way Caesar is depicted in the book is brilliant – he is fiercely ambitious but often unsure of himself. You are party to his internal battles where as he becomes the leader of Rome he becomes more and more isolated. Nice that he ends up with the most desirable woman in the world as well.
The Facebook Effect by David Kirkpatrick. This must-read for fans of business books or social media, details the rise of Facebook, from a Harvard dorm room to global dominance. The story of Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg is the most fascinating part. He is an incredibly bright programmer who has to deal with a phenomenal amount of pressure and make big decisions at such a young age. He does a few things incredibly well: he chooses the right people to work with, is passionate and single minded about his vision and is completely confident in himself.
Shake Hands with the Devil by Roméo Dallaire. This macabre choice is a first-hand account of the Rwandan genocide (in which a million people lost their lives) written by the force commander of the UN mission in Rwanda at the time. It is startling and vivid account of unimaginable horror. Dallaire spent years blaming himself for the horrors in Rwanda and he is self-aware throughout. The tale itself shows him working tirelessly to persuade the leaders at the UN to give him the resources he needs. From him we can learn tireless devotion of trying to do the right thing in the face of extreme adversity.
A Thousand Hills by Stephen Kinzer. Staying with the theme of Rwanda and the genocide, this book is about the current President of Rwanda, Paul Kagame. It is a no holds barred account of his incredible struggle against adversity to stop the genocide and lead Rwanda into a brighter future. We can learn from Paul Kagame’s tireless optimism in the face of what looks like certain failure.
Casino Royale by Ian Fleming. I could have chosen any James Bond here but I have gone with this first. From the serious to the trivial, this series of books about the fantastical world of a British super hero is hugely entertaining but also useful for all aspiring alpha males. The character Bond is basically an alcoholic womaniser and probably psychopathic, but he just deals with situations so well. From him we can learn how to be calm, how to be cool and how to get the girl.
A Will to Win by David Meek. This year in the life of Alex Ferguson during the 1996-97 season is a fascinating insight into one of the most respected managers in world football. Now Alex Ferguson is in his 25th year this is an interesting look back 15 years to when his legacy wasn’t by any means cemented. The book takes on a diary format and you see him grapple with selection and transfer dilemmas. He is very single-minded and what stands out is his love for his job and the dedication he puts into it.
Addicted by Tony Adams. I read this a while ago and I still think about it all the time. Adams was a successful footballer who ended up imprisoned for drink driving. He was a young guy caught up in being a success and succumbing to drink. This is a great story of how he faced up to his problems and eventually overcame them. What he did required a deep inner desire to improve himself.
Anyone Can Do It by Duncan Bannatyne. I am a huge Dragons Den fan and have nothing but admiration for self-made business people. The great thing about Bannatyne is that he really was self-made from absolutely nothing. He was penniless at 30 and had no contacts, capital or clue what he was doing. Through his tenacity, drive and willingness to work hard and take a risk he amassed a fortune. I love his single-mindedness.
The Real Deal by James Caan. Another book from a dragon, this is a great story of how James Caan made his fortune. What strikes me about this book is Caan’s willingness to think outside the box. Recruitment in the UK was done in a very set way and he looked at the model and felt he could do a lot better. I loved how he was always thinking one step ahead
Moneyball by Michael Lewis. Alex recommended this story of Billy Beane and it has recently been turned into a Hollywood film starring Brad Pitt. Beane is general manager of the Oakland A’s MLB team and he achieves extraordinary success by using statistics to choose his players. He is obsessive in the pursuit of his goal.
What We Can Learn
While writing this list I was thinking about what all of these men have in common. They were certainly not all born with confidence and many went through period of intense self-doubt.
As we look to get better with women we will all need to go through these feelings as well; there will be days where a date completely tanks or you feel impotent on a night out. When this happens try to draw inspiration from successful people that have been through the same problems. In particular I’m sure you noticed two traits that all our heroes showed:
Single-minded. Whether it be sporting, business or military they were all focussed on achieving something important. Without this dedication and single-mindedness they would certainly not have achieved what they have. If you want to really get better with women you need to be the same. You can’t dabble at it- you need to make a choice that you are going to make a real difference in your life and follow through relentlessly.
Innovative. They understood that there were a number of ways to achieve their goal. When looking to get better with women you need to be open to new ideas and new approaches. If bars have been working averagely for ten years then be open to new ideas, be it approaching women in the day or internet dating. If you’ve never been one for fashion, try buying some cool clothes and see if it helps. Don’t keep following a path which isn’t reaping the results you want.
If you have read some books with alpha males you think we should add to this list we’d love to know.